Joy--do you dare?

"But I want you to know, brethren, that the things which happened to me have actually turned out for the furtherance of the gospel, so that it has become evident to the whole palace guard, and to all the rest, that my chains are in Christ; an most of the brethren in the Lord, having become confident by my chains, are much more bold to speak the word without fear." Philippians 1:12-14

Dad preached on this first chapter of Philippians in church on Sunday. My mind--which has a fearful habit of wandering--fixed upon these verses and stayed there while the rest of the universe whirled on. I am afraid I was not even thinking very hard upon the rest of the chapter, for I had my share of the sermon in these two verses.

I began thinking of Paul. He was thrown into prison, beaten, mocked, etc. and yet his attitude in these verses is not:

 "Poor me--look at what you might have to suffer for Christ!" 

= But =

"This is awesome! I want you to know that this is the epitome of my ministry! This is why I follow Christ."

Soon that thought was followed by another. How effective would Paul's ministry have been if, instead of this outlook, Paul had sulked? The letter to the Philippians might not have even been written if Paul decided to "have a reality check" and dwell in how he perceived the situation. In a way, the effectiveness of Paul's ministry depended upon his attitude. It was indeed Paul who said "To live is Christ, to die is gain," and yet I think too often martyrs of the faith have a "See me and be filled with holy dread" aura about them. Paul was cheerful in his chains. And because of that his ministry was far greater than he could have imagined!

To apply this to my own life, I thought back on last year--it was a difficult year, full of the strain and stress of starting up a naturally-grown produce farm/flowers/bakery. I'm not saying it wasn't a good year, but it was certainly a trial. And I am ashamed (and yet want to be truthful) to admit that I sulked. I sulked nearly all year. Not outwardly [most of the time] but in my heart of hearts I was being an ox--a beast that did not like what was going on and did not want to be in an uncomfortable spot and could not wait till it was all over. It was not just me that realized it was hard...in the past months when friends have asked if we are doing the same thing again this year, their questions have been tempered with remarks such as:

"Yeah...it sounded pretty stressful."

"Yes, I could tell it was a hard year for all of you."

Eeesh. Was it that obvious? Oh dear. I learned a lot and grew a lot over the year, and by the autumn my attitude was changing. But as we read these verses in church on Sunday, I couldn't help but wonder how much more I could have learned and how much more ministry I could have had if I had had a cheerful, submissive heart over it all. Paul's reaction to imprisonment was an inspiration to me--having a cheerful heart and playing Pollyanna are all very good things to talk about in theory, but when the nitty-gritty moments come, are we letting Jesus have his way with us? Are we accepting it all with joyful hearts, truly knowing that something beautiful will rise out of the ashes of the situation?

This skill can be applied to so many areas of life. I think of Sarah Mally, author of Before You Meet Prince Charming. (A fabulous book for younger teen girls)

Sarah, Stephen, and Grace Mally)

She is 30 years old and still unmarried, yet because Sarah has been faithful to the Lord during her single years and has lived them joyfully and fully, she has become a role-model for hundreds of young women across the nation and around the world. If Sarah had decided to bemoan her lot and sit with her hands folded until a guy came and swept her off her feet, I can imagine she'd be a bitter, lonely old maid. But the term "old-maid" could no more be applied to Sarah Mally than it could be applied to a mother with a dozen children. Being an "old-maid" is a state of the heart--not the circumstance. But I digress.

In short, I was just struck by the idea that the effectiveness of our ministry is, in some measure, inversely proportional to our attitude through-out the trial. What are your thoughts on it? :)