a great big boizelling day :)

"An adventure is just an inconvenience rightly considered. An inconvenience is just an adventure wrongly considered." -G.K. Chesterton

Just a usual day...just the usual run of errands...

At least that's what I thought. Sarah and Leah were headed out with Daniel to do lawns. Dad was working another job. Mama and the rest of us needed to cash a check in VB and then do a Walmart & Sam's Club run. Yes, it was a tremendously hot day, but that's nothing unusual come summertime in Virginia.
Mama has been having me do all the driving--lots of practice makes for perfection, right? ;) But today she needed to dictate a grocery list and besides: she had a hunch she ought to drive.

Boy, am I glad she did.

We hadn't been long on the highway when there was a terrific jolt and a heart-clenching CHUNK-CHUNK-CHUNK-CHUNK-CHUNK!! We held our breath and prayed.Mama limped the van over to the side of the highway. Turns out the belt in our tire had busted and sheared off the entire driver's side step of the van. Yeah. How does that happen?
Six kids and a Mama on the side of the highway in temperatures that would melt the coldest constitution. Surely that's a cause to rouse chivalry? Pity? Okay...at least a stare as you drive by? Nope. Apparently not. Though Dad was on the way after Mama called him, not a single car stopped by (or even slowed down) in the hour and a half that we were sitting on the side of the road.

Not a one.

In an hour and a half.

And we were hardly out of country-territory where the art of gentlemanly-ness is still practiced, albeit with a sweat-stained t-shirt and a can of beer in hand.

I was mentally bemoaning the un-novelism of it all. I mean honestly--here I am, a perfectly single and unattached young lady, and now would have been the ideal time for a mechanical-savvy, charming stranger to stop by and give us a hand. But I guess mechanical-savvy, charming strangers are a little in awe of a big blue van full of kids. Maybe my curse of looking too capable raised its head. Let's face it girls...I just can't pull off The Damsel in Distress, unlike some people. (*glares at Abigail*)
Grace had similar ideas to me, though hers took the shape of something along these lines: "Hey! United Steaks of America Motorcycles--we need help changin' a tire!" (yes--that's what she howled at every motorcyclist passing by.) To add insult to injury, we happened to have pulled off the highway right over top a nest of yellow, biting, creepy horseflies. They invaded the van like an Egyptian plague. Thus, the conversation in the van ran along these lines:

Grace: "It's boizelling hot out here!"
Mama: "Sit down."
Everyone: "There's another one!" *slap!*
Me: "Benjamin--for the last time--get buckled."
Everyone: "And another one!"
Grace: "We're gonna be stuck here till Fourfin-July!"
Mama: "Benjamin--get buckled!"
Benjamin: "I found a bag of apples back here--we forgot to take 'em outta the van last time we shopped...can we eat one?"
Grace: "UNITED STEAKS OF AMERICA MOTORCYCLES--we need help changin' a ti-re!"
Everyone: "Look! There's more coming through the window!" *slap! slap!*
Grace: "Send us some A/C, Lord!"

(Have I mentioned lately that Grace could make a living doing stand-up comedy? Yep. She could.) Eventually Dad came (bearing Gatorade, no less!) to rescue us off the side of the road. We were oodles  happy. :) Then he took us to lunch, and we were oodles happier. But that still didn't change the fact that we hadn't done any of our shopping. But we got to the bank and deposited our checks, and all was very good and tidy...till we got back onto the highway.
Somehow we'd missed the warning that Monsoon Season was happening at exactly 3:30 PM on June 22, 2012 Literally inches and inches and inches of water, punctuated by thunder and lightening piled on top of each-other. We barely got to Walmart and Sam's. When we did, we split. I took Benjamin and Abby and shopped Walmart while faking a British accent. It was epic. Anna and Mama and the youngerest ones did the Sam's Club shopping.
And I had to shop for a bathing suit. You've no idea--or maybe you have--how hard it is to find a bathing suit that fits in all the proper places. (namely la bust) But I got something that'll work for now till I have time to make my own swim-suit. (Which ought to be happening fairly soon. :) Once that happened and we paid for everything, it was time to go. We braved the monsoon (getting soaked) and loaded groceries. We braved the monsoon (getting soaked) and headed home. We braved the monsoon (getting soaked) and unloaded groceries.

Adventurous shopping trip, no? :) 

I loved every minute of it.